CSI-4 distressed: what your relationship score means

What this result means

The CSI-4 is the Couples Satisfaction Index, a validated brief measure of relationship satisfaction (Funk & Rogge, 2007). It scores 0 to 21, with 13.5 as the cutoff separating satisfied from distressed couples. A total of 7 or below sits well under that line — a strong signal of genuine dissatisfaction on your read of things right now.

The post-baby context still matters, and a dip is normal — roughly two-thirds of couples report falling satisfaction in the early years (Gottman Institute). But a score this low is at the deeper end of that range, and it's the kind of result that's hard to shift with small tweaks alone. That's not a judgement on you or your partner; it's a sign the strain has built up enough that outside support is warranted.

Where this score sits

The CSI-4 runs from 0 to 21. Its authors identified 13.5 as the cutoff that best separates satisfied couples from distressed ones — at or above the line is the satisfied range, below it signals notable dissatisfaction. Here's the ladder, with your band marked:

• 0–7 — Distressed (well below the line) (you are here)
• 8–13 — Below the line (notable dissatisfaction)
• 14–21 — Satisfied (above the line)

What to do next

Two things at once. First, day to day, keep whatever small threads of connection you can — they still matter, and Regular can help you rebuild them one doable move at a time. Second, and more importantly at this level: bring in a professional. Consider talking it through with a couples therapist or counsellor. Reaching out is a strength move, and couples therapy is most useful before resentment hardens, not after.

If your partner isn't ready to go together, individual counselling still helps — it gives you a place to think clearly and decide what you need. You can also see your full checkup, since a low mood in one partner and low relationship satisfaction often travel together.

When to get help

Now is a reasonable time to get help. A score this low is a clear, evidence-based reason to talk to a professional — a couples therapist, counsellor, or your GP for a referral. Relationships at this level respond well to real support, and asking for it is the strong move.

There's one line that overrides everything else: if there is abuse, coercion, control, or you feel unsafe in the relationship, this is not a satisfaction problem to work on — your safety comes first. Please find mental-health support in your country, reach out to someone you trust, or call your local emergency services if you're in immediate danger.