A new Wheatley Institute and Institute for Family Studies survey of 2,000+ partnered young adults found that 1 in 7 (15%) regularly chat with an AI romantic companion — and more than half either fully hide it or only partly tell their real partner. Nearly 70% said it mattered to them that their partner never learns the full extent.
Here's the part that stops you: the study links regular AI-companion use to a 46% lower chance of being in a stable relationship and a 40% drop in the odds of high-quality communication with your actual partner. Meanwhile a July piece in The Conversation asked the question everyone's now dancing around — if you flirt with a bot, does that count as cheating? About half of people say yes.
I don't think most of these people are villains. Late at night, tired and unseen, a companion that always validates you is a soft place to land. But the researchers named the trap clearly: it's the old pattern of taking your frustrations to a third party instead of your partner — except this third party is engineered to always agree with you. It doesn't build the muscle you actually need. It quietly replaces it.
Source: The Conversation, July 9, 2026 · data from Wheatley Institute / Institute for Family Studies, "Secret Soulmates" report, 2026
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